CONNECT THE DOTS...

After today's episode of spinorama, where even their friends are having a hard time defending the stair running, question dodging and childish caterwalling, one might be compelled to cut so-called leader Stephen Harper some slack and take his word from the Big Easy...

Except for this slight hitch ...

And this minor boo-boo ... "Harper, 2 other MPs Exceeded Donation Limit" -CBC, Dec 27 2006

... that was followed by this resignation...

Then there was this mish-mash ... nothing says integrity like an 'out-of-court' settlement with a confidentiality clause at the end.

Kind of defeats the purpose of confidentiality when the defacto Prime Minister talks to a reporter on an accusation of bribing a dying man. But hey, he's playing chess, people. We're still playing checkers.

IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD COMEDY OF ERRORS...

Abbott and Costello, the Marx Brothers and the Three Stooges would be stars in Stephen Harper's not-so newish northern-starless CONservative government.
But they'd lose the comedy spotlight to Harper's self-satirists.
If you didn't catch the hilarious hijinks, check out Kady's place, or Paul's quick hits, or Aaron's disection of the warrant.
This government has done the impossible: resurrected vaudeville.
You've got bumbling ministers, prat-falling through national and international affairs. A prime minister who, when not fawning over his own image, takes to the alleys to enact the fight scene from From Here To Eternity. Backroom boys offering a lifetime membership to the CON party to a dying member of parliament -- or a million dollar sweepstake winning ticket -- and now the company bigwigs - let's call them chuckles and groan -- running down the fire stairs to avoid the press they thought they could canoodle with a crock 'n bull punch line.
It's apparent now, wading through the evidence uncovered behind CON-EDY Central, that not even the CON's own people were buying all of Harper's bull.
The latest tidbits from the RCMP-aided raid on CON headquarters has turned up ties to one of the few accomplished ministers, and more than a few unaccomplished ones, too. The only person who seems to be free from this stain to date is the non-democratic Michel Fortier. I guess his disinterest in democracy has shielded him from this can of worms.
And it almost makes perfect sense that the main man has darted off for a photo op with the most despised elected official in American history. However, I don't know if being seen besides Harper's American Idol back home is going to help cover up the growing stench of the in-and-out scandal.
Maybe it's time to call in Putin.

COINCIDENTAL PENALTIES...

My, what a fortunate piece of timing this is.
Days after some great video and mounds of ink have been splashed about on the RCMP's attending a raid at the CON head quarters, there is a former Liberal Party member being charged with wrongdoing.
Of course, if one were a blogbot from the CON universe, it would be the kind of timing one would decry as 'deliberate.' A 'set-up.' Oh right, that's only if it shone a light on CON misdoings.
No, that the RCMP laid charges on a Liberal for having ripped off the Liberal Party of $50,000 is likely just an item that came to fruition. All the things likely just fell into place, and as the one RCMP spokesperson was quoted as saying, semi-ominously, "It's highly likely that there will be other charges."
That's nice to hear -- and hopefully the officer was referring to wrongdoers of all stripes. It appears that even after appointing the head of the RCMP, Elections Canada and an ethics commissioner, Stephen Harper still has to read the riot act.
'We're as white as snow,' he might have said, before getting nudged by Captain Multicultural-outreacher Jason Kenney.
Nope, despite already having had his own lies revealed in CON electionary deeds with a former candidate, Harper can still climb up on the white steed and pretend to be Prince Valiant. At least Friday's announcement likely bought him some more time to put the fear of death into his appointed hatchetmen.
Certainly, the charges to Corbeil are not the greatest news the Liberals could hope for after what must have seemed like a banner week. Those 'How falleth Dion' stories and columns ad nauseum had to be put on hold while members of the fifth estate had to turn their gaze to real news.
Although the charge has nothing to do with the Sponsorship Scandal, it is being linked as such. Possibly, Corbeil will have to answer for things on that file too. If it does fall that way, it should only be fair that, for a scandal so tightly wound with the Liberal brand, at least one prominent member or former member of the Liberal Party, should be indicted for it.
You see, it isn't well reported at all that Chuck Guite and Jean Brault are former CONserfative members.
Oh, but back to that lucky CON timing thing.

GENDER NEUTRAL...

Forget about Mr In-Out and the great Liberal Conspiracy. It's pure goose for the gander.
What I'd like to know is why this poll is being played up almost entirely as a 'women's movement'?
Where were the 'gender-specific' headlines when polls showed a solid CON lead, that must of highlighted the "Heavy White Males Give Tories A Boost"?
It's not that I'm suggesting that CP or Decima are targeting Liberal support for dissection, but this kind of quick, misleading analysis certainly creates another boogeyman, or should I say boogey-woman, for those insecure, paranoid Harperoids.
Although Decima's findings, that put the Liberals ahead of CONs by 10% among female voters, is relevant, what it doesn't say is that in most recent federal elections, women have trended Liberal. It's like stating "Children Prefer Puppies to Dentists".
I also find it hilarious that the writer needed to include this conclusion: The Tories are "bedevilled by their failure to attract more support among women voters despite working hard to do so."
Who would have thought cancelling funding for women's centres, setting our environmental goals to the lowest common denominator, squashing universal child care, spending like a drunken sailor on the military, and turning secrecy and bullying into an art form wouldn't win over the ladies?
And if the margin between the two parties is a thin 3% -- the margin of error in most of these snapshots -- what does that say where most men are parking their votes? And with all recent polls that show the two parties nearly neck-n-neck, why haven't the headline writers come out and say another probable conclusion: "Alberta Keeps Tories Afloat"?
The main conclusion I can drum up from this poll is that if you're a single, heterosexual male between the ages 28-50, you should be thinking Liberal. It's way better than doing the CON late-night party-line numbers...

BEHIND CLOSE DOORS...

That's apparently where Stephen Harper's CONserfative government believes a lot of governing needs to be done.
It may just be circumstantial evidence that two key policy directives were hidden deep inside other major motions. While that raises suspicions, all you need to do is dig deeper to find the old ugly head of Reform politics seeping out.
Harper has safely selected a few pawns to play the role of benevolent deciders. Whether its immigration or funding for Canadian films, the 'official interpretation' is benign guidance. But the reality is a parochial threat through malignant manoevering.
While both these policy steps, which wouldn't look out of step from Uncle Joe Stalin's hand book on governing, are meant to demonstrate strong change in directions, they also reveal the strident right-side edge of Harper.
Putting the oversight of all immigration decisions in the hands of 'one minister' who can give a thumbs-up or thumbs-down, essentially muting the voices of trained officials, isn't meant to speed up a cumbersome immigration system. By giving one 'person' -- and let us pretend that Harper won't be pulling the levers -- will only result in more hidden agenda-style decision-making. Just check out the government's record on virtually every other file and its promise for 'openness.'
It in fact centralizes and politicizes the act of immigration -- which has already seen its share recently, as in Harper's delay and neglect in the refugee claimant process. It allows Harper the opportunity to shift and reshape Canada's current system, which encourages family unification and skill accreditation, to a more business-friendly collage of temporary work visas and selective ethnic communities. For those things that can't be outsourced, many mega-corporations will stock their employee shelves with lower-paid foreigners without the same job protection as Canadian workers.
And then there's the hamhanded attempt to give the CONs' Christian-right supporters a bone by tightly regulating federal funding for the film industry.
Under the aspices of trying to keep federal funding out of the hands of pornographers (and violence in films, although that's just a ruse for a party that steathily wishes to protect the rights of every gun owner), Harper wants Josie and her PuttyTats wearing the black hat on who gets what. Of course, every decision, like everything else done in this Ottawa, will be filtered tightly through the PMO.
They've even sent out the snarky adolescent Pierre Pooh to try and knock down Sarah Polley, the actor and director who's stood up and talked strongly against the government's censorship bill. The insolent wimp wouldn't stand a chance.
These two acts are dangerous hints at what lies in store if Harper is to continue to govern. It's time to pull the plug.

JUDY, YOU'RE SOAKING IN IT...

... And that ain't palmolive, Ms. Weaselyca-Leis.
How's it feel to be proven a rube for the right? I know, I know, something about "somebody had to do it." (Premonitional hat-tip to the Jurist)

Funny that, how when a release naming someone UNDER investigation came across your desk you didn't wonder just why this RCMP dude was telling you for. Or thought, hey, is this normal procedure? After all, neither his predecessor nor the RCMP were in the habit of naming names when an investigation was launched on, well, say this until charges were laid...
Now that you've helped rid the country of the Kelowna and Kyoto accords, reduced the dream of national childcare program to a by-gone era, helped hack such pesky ideas such as funding for women's groups and funding court challenges, and ensured that the new government's Zaccardelli won't be seriously investigating anything on government wrongdoing (except when using Mr Aspar Peabody's wayback machine), what are you going to do for an encore?

Maybe this guy needs a new blabbermouth...

LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS...

So Mr Zaccardelli, inquiring minds want to know...

Where do you turn when you need a $ One Million Dollar Life Insurance Policy?