Saturday, February 27, 2010

SHARING THE CREDIT...


Certainly, the Canadian-esque disowning of the 'Own the Podium' earlier this week was a tad premature.
Canadian athletes did as we expected them to -- made us proud, and reached beyond our expectations.
That the 'Own the Podium' program had set expectations beyond what we're use to may have played a role. Governments and corporations and communities all stepped forward to assist our athletes in reaching the targets they had dreamed of.
Naturally, Stephen Harper's CONs will all be about getting their photos with the champions -- perfectly understandable, since no government would turn down that possible connection. However, their support seems to stop there. I recall Pierre Trudeau boarding the plane in 1972 when Team Canada touched down after edging the Soviet Union during the great, untoppable Summit Series.
While Harper wouldn't dare acknowledge it, and most athletes likely have forgotten, I think it's a good time to make sure the credit for some of these initiatives is spread to more than today's spotlight grabbers.
Former B.C. premier Glen Clark, who put a lot of his personal moxie on the line to get Vancouver into the competition of winning the 2010 bid.
Former Prime Minister Jean Chretien, for being a full supporter from the moment go.
Former Prime Minister Paul Martin, for creating and funding the 'Own the Podium' program. Former sports minister and B.C. MP Stepehn Owen was the point person.
Chretien and Martin deserve some extra credit, too, for creating the economic conditions where a two-week bash in the middle of winter wouldn't be a financial burden on a nation. Unfortunately, someone else came along and punched holes in that rainy day fund to where now B.C.ers and Canadians will be paying for the party for a long time.
Gold medals all around, gentlemen!

Friday, February 26, 2010

LAME FOLLOWING THE IMMATERIAL...


Meet Andy Radia. He's no one's answer to Rachel Marsden, that's for certain, but he may be one small community newspaper's version of Karnak, a character from the ol' Johnny Carson Tonight Show.
Perhaps he's a faux mystic with the foresight of a bowling ball.
Unfortunately, Andy's not funny, nor nearly as insightful as 30-year-old jokes from a laboured comedy skit.
In today's copy of the Tri-City News, he's scrambling a little behind the times in trying to defend the so-called leader's pro-rogatory holiday.
Andy, who fashions himself as Telly Savalas for the right, doesn't use any new talking points, because after all, the CON handbook depends upon repetition of same-old, same-old until you either surrender or become ambivalent, or both.
"Yada-yada others did it too," says Andy.
He says Bob Rae "shamelessly" used it while premier -- thus questioning his own so-called leader's level of shame in the process.
"Yada-yada coalition of evil," snorts Andy.
Conveniently forgetting this agreement, aren't we, Andy?
"Yada-yada busy agenda for ze big leader," mutters Andy.
Funny, all those items he lists, except the photo op in Haiti where Harper kindly forced Haitian officials to ignore local emergency responsibilities to protect a visiting dignitary who once upon a time couldn't get out of Dodge fast enough to avoid an AIDS convention, kinda sound like things that routinely happen in Ottawa when the session's in.
The defence of Harper's prorogue holiday isn't getting easier. But the defendants are getting lamer.

In honour of the real Karnac, please glance and chortle/smirk/groan through some Carson classics:

A: A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou.
Q: Name three things that have yeast.

A: The Nestea Plunge.
Q: What does the president of Nestea use when his toilet is topped up?

A: A, B, C, D, E, F, G.
Q: What were some of the earlier forms of Preparation H?

A: Shoo-be-doo-be-doo.
Q: What do you look for when you're tracking a shoo-be-doo-be?

A: Zippo Marx.
Q: What do you get when something gets caught in your Zippo?

A: Kitchy-kitchy-koo.
Q: What do you call a military coup led by General Kitchy Kitchy?

A: Big Ben, Joe Namath and a candidate's campaign promises.
Q: What is a clock, a jock and a crock.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

MAXIME'S SILVER HAMMER...


Maxime Bernier is showing signs of Dead CON Walking... By showing refreshing candor, the former minister/biker-chick dater has broken one of Stephen Harper's key personal rules -- don't say what we're thinking!
Bernier wrote a letter to La Presse newspaper that said the CON government was wilfully sluggish on environmental action because the decision-makers doubted the evidence of global warming.

"There is, in fact, no scientific consensus. What's certain is that it would be irresponsible to spend billions of dollars to impose unnecessarily stringent regulations to resolve a problem whose gravity we still are not certain about."

Harper's man-of-imobility, Jimmy Prentice, did his best to backpedal and hide from Bernier's assertion, but c'mon. A good portion of CON blogging nation has gone viral over the past six months about how climate change is some leftist conspiracy to lower the activity of our precious bodily fluids.



I think no doubt Harper and his agents have done a good job of hiding their true feelings and true plans for Canada's government. He's tried to hug the mushy middle, done his own Mr. Dithers routine with just an added impersonation of Robert Conrad -- "I dare you to knock this battery off my shoulder! I dare yah!"

CONs have tried a number of ways to test drive their more cavemen-esque ideas on the nation. They've established a habit for punking polls -- getting Trudeau's name atop the Most Hated Canadian poll a couple of years ago was their trial run.
Harper himself has gone on record that stats and facts should carry little weight when it comes to gut instincts.

Evidence is bad. Those April blossoms that are currently decorating the cherry trees in Vancouver? Not a sign of climate change. The ice floes that have disappeared? Nope, no sign. The various changes of ocean species washing ashore in the formerly cold waters of the north pacific? That's right, not a sign. Did you know that you could run an eight-cylinder Cadillac in a 10'x 40' garage, keep the doors closed until it runs out of gas, and the air quality would sustain plenty of life, while healing heartburn and goiters?
That's the kind of thought process the CONs are offering, but in a more strategic way. Attacking the credibility of the data and data-gatherers. Swiftboating the Geeks, in other words.
Are we going to buy it? Apparently, Harper and his gang aren't eager to stand behind their own beliefs, which you'd think would make some of their true believers angry. What's worse is that just by repeating those beliefs, even if its just to deny that they hold them, helps create a faux-truth to them.
That's your Harper. Too nakedly ambitious to lead.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

FAMILIAR REFRAIN...


...about the meddlers and meddlesome jobs they do. I think it was Anthony Newley who sang it. Or maybe Kate Smith.
Neither here nor there. But it appears old habits die hard with the CON-voluted anti-governing party, who bet their meal ticket on a racist band of hick reactionaries in Quebec, and are now being accused of tying their cannard to the growing popularity of the Wildrose Alliance of Alberta.
We can always count on that slick chess-playing huntsman, Harper, to push the envelope. Currently using the Olympics as cover for some despicable governmental organization disabling, the so-called leader is willing to soil his party's name in the homeland to prop up Rob Anders, his private dunderhead.
Prorogue once, twice, three times a loser. Like that eventual housing bubble -- remember, what happens down south typically takes 3-4 years before the echo hits here -- Harper's time is coming.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

HELP WANTED...


So Stephen Harper has finally clued in that his crew of climate-change deniers in cabinet just don't know how to rag the puck convincingly, and now he has to hire one.
Enviro-not minister Jim Prentice is too busy working on his succession speech to Big Oil to handle the chore of working with our spiritual leadership from down south? Perhaps he just can't keep up with the high-falutin' words and talk, especially when U.S. government officials start talking about 'action.' After all, that word only is used as an adjective/slogan in CON circles.
Who wants to bet that Harper's next pointman to this 'underling of the U.S. environment department' will come with highly familiar American credentials. Even the tepid response to the government's Canada Pavilion - a tent purchased at Chicago's Montgomery Ward at a cost of $10M - isn't going to bump Harper off track. Spending money is getting to be an expensive habit for this so-called leader. American PR firms to get him on Fox, American consultants to build our own Olympic pavilion, republican thinktanks offering dirty trick seminars -- I'm betting Harper goes south with this position, too. Even his predisposed supporters are beginning to catch on that money is no obstacle when it comes to spreading the Harper manure -- especially if its only taxpayers dollars.
Perhaps an FOI should be filed regarding last week's agreement on Buy American. Because right now it looks like that U.S. program is one policy that Harper is embracing.